The Maze

Life is…The Maze

I was talking with a friend who had been hurt, not physically, but emotionally hurt by a friend. We’ve all been there, right? It sucks! I asked what I could do, and she said, “Make me a map on how to get through it.” I chuckled, and she

said, “You’re a writer.”
I have been thinking about that conversation for weeks.

Here’s a map – not an extensive, all-purpose, perfect map, but some things I do when I’m hurt.

Funny thing is, when I was trying to connect the lines I was trying to do it in a nice, orderly manner.
Well, that didn’t work out!
It’s a messy map going all different ways, trying things, forgiving, getting upset again, forgiving, picking up the hurt again, until finally we can forgive and continue on. Because when we’re truly hurting we’re not really carrying on with life. We’re spiraling around that one issue.

So these lines are like life…Messy! Did you see that sneaky, yellow line in there? It’s in there, because unfortunately we will get hurt again.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
Now that’s a great But…”Take heart! I have overcome the world!”

Reading

Life is...Reading

 “ABCDEFG…..Now I know my ABCs. Next time won’t you sing with me?” Learning to read commonly starts out with this fun song, but it takes years of learning each next step to read and finally master the English language. Teaching a child to read requires patience and time.
Last week, (light bulb) David could read a 3 letter word! Then another one! Then another one! I was elated, overjoyed. YES!!!!! We did it!
The next day we tried a 3 letter word, and he couldn’t read it. He was adding T sounds where there was no T. He was frustrated and said he couldn’t read.
What? We just had it! You know your letter sounds. Just sound it out. You can do it!
Why are you struggling with something you already know?
Light bulb for me…. I wonder if God sees our lives like we see a child learn to read?
He sees us struggle with the most basic, fundamental principles of being Christian: showing Love, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, & Self-Control (Galatians 5:22-23)
Then we get it!
He is overjoyed! Yes, they understand! Now they can make a difference. Now they can impact the world.  The next day we struggle. We can’t seem to love God or our neighbor (Mark 12:30-31).

Do we give up? Does God give up on us?
No! Just as you don’t give up on your child learning to read God will not give up on you! (Micah 7:18) And with the right encouragement your child continues the reading process through the struggle and success.
So will you.

Dreams (part 2)

Life is...Dreams (part 2)

Waiting for someone to die is hard, emotionally draining. I was miles away struggling: how do I be there for her and my family? Had I done enough? Had I said everything I wanted to say? I had, a million times, but still those doubts come. Gma wanted to go to heaven. I had never seen her stop fighting before. She was ready.

Sometimes I asked God, why don’t you take her? Please don’t make her suffer!

“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” Ecclesiastes 3:11

God’s timing is perfect!

Maybe Gma was ready, but her friends and family weren’t. God had something to teach us through that time of waiting.

Dreams

Life is...Dreams

Grandma (Gma) Redenius and I were sitting in a parking lot. I was driving and she was in the passenger seat. She said, “Get a cookie if there are still some in the freezer.” I knew she meant one of hers – cooking and baking were part of who she was & she passed on that gift. I gave her another huge hug and with tears in my eyes I said, “You know I love you very much.” She nodded. She was almost too tired to respond. She looked at me and said, “You have to let me go now. I need to rest.” I agreed. I put her car into drive, held her hand, and said, “I will be right here.” We started driving. She closed her eyes and not long after, she went to heaven. I pulled over, cried, and opened the window (symbolically letting her spirit go).

I woke up.

The clock said 3:44 am. I knew I wouldn’t be sleeping anymore that night. I went to the bathroom & prayed. My daughter cried. I was reminded that life goes on, even if we’re not ready for it to. (Ecclesiastes 3:2) I fed Rachel and then covered up my son and gave him a kiss before I started the long day…

I waited to hear - was Gma still in hospice or was she finally Home.

Home with the Lord she had served her whole life.

Leadership

Life is...Leadership 

Who is a great leader? For me I can think of several people, but my dad is at the top of the list. I doubt he would think of himself as a leader, but through him I learned what it means to be an ethical, Godly business person. Some people have the gift of words. Others show you by their actions. My dad taught me hard work by working hard himself, and allowing me to work beside him. I noticed how he interacted with employees, always being patient, kind, and never losing his temper, even when a mistake cost him money. He only asked that we tell him if we messed up (don't hide our mistake) and work to fix it.

At the time I didn't realize this is what God calls us to do in all aspects of our life.

Mostly I remember how he treated his customers - taking the time to talk with an elderly woman who needed to know someone cared. I know he could have made more money, but he always stuck to the price quoted. This is what has stayed with me. 

Every day on his way to work and his way home my dad walks by this poem (credited to Mother Teresa).

        People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.  

Forgive them anyway.

            If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.  

Be kind anyway.

            If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. 

Succeed anyway.

           If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. 

Be honest and sincere anyway.

            What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. 

Create anyway.

            If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. 

Be happy anyway.

            The good you do today, will often be forgotten. 

Do good anyway.

         Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. 

Give your best anyway.

         In the final analysis, it is between you and God. 

It was never between you and them anyway.

Contemplate and remember this powerful poem as you navigate this crazy life? 
Tell your story...www.GenerationsToGenerations.com

Waiting

Life is…Waiting

My grandma told me a beautiful, true story about waiting, perseverance, and entrusting others. Aren’t all stories about waiting beautiful after the fact? We love stories about waiting and perseverance…Abraham and Sarah who waited 25 years for God’s promise of a son. Abraham Lincoln who became President after 11 setbacks, but I don’t want to wait for amazing things to happen in my life.
Right before Christmas my grandma had a children’s book she had written & illustrated over 50 years ago published. It is truly an answer to prayer to see it being sold on Amazon, Barnes & Nobles, in the U.S., India, and the UK. The story of my grandma trying and hoping to get the book published is similar to her book The Lucky Penny. You see a penny goes on a “waiting adventure”: just going through a “normal penny life” until…well, I won’t ruin the end for you, but it has a special mission.
Isn’t that how we feel: just going through life, waiting, trying, failing, trying to do something important, and sometimes after a long time we see “the fruit of our labor”.
So, on to my story. One quiet night Grandma wrote The Lucky Penny. When she showed it to a few people she didn’t get an encouraging response, but she still felt it was good, so she called a publishing company. The man met her, read her book, and liked it, but $300 was needed to publish it, which they didn’t have. Still not wanting to give up she asked her father for a loan. Denied. Feeling frustrated and overwhelmed she put the book on a shelf where it stayed for decades until my cousin saw it and encouraged her to copy it for the family and a few friends. Not receiving a response she felt discouraged again. It went back on the shelf until a few years ago when Chris and I started the publishing process.

This story is so much like the story she wrote years ago, and so much like our lives. We are excited, we fail, we’re encouraged, we try again, we get “put on a shelf”, we fail, we succeed. I think it was worth the wait, but then again, it wasn’t me waiting in this story. Though we never see the whole picture I hope you can see part of the puzzle fit together in your life, even if it’s just one part.
“Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what is still possible for you to do.” ~Pope John XXIII
https://www.amazon.com/Lucky-Penny-Shirley-Redenius/dp/1505284163
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-lucky-penny-shirley-redenius/1125337179

Hands & Feet

Life is…Hands & Feet

I only need to open Facebook to see someone mourning. In one day I saw 4 people post that they had lost a loved one. I’m bombarded with sadness. If I’m not careful I become overwhelmed and shut down instead of connecting. How often do I send a sad emoji or a quick note – sometimes that’s all I can do -but putting actions to words takes me out of my own life – makes me realize, really realize, I’m not the center. In the Bible we see Jesus not just giving words but getting messy and involved: truly “mourning with those who mourn.” (Romans 12:15) Jesus physically helped people: the blind man, the leper, the dead girl, just to name a few. He didn’t help everyone, and we don’t need to either - we can’t.

I’ve seen a few instances this last week of people putting aside their own agendas and busy schedules and loving others: my mom brining soup and sitting with a sick friend and a man at church organizing a work day where many came to help a grieving widow.
Many times we here “Be the Hands and Feet of Jesus” it sounds nice – let’s actually do it!

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Real Life

Life is…Real Life

I was watching NCIS; this particular episode was about WWII. I love stories about “The Greatest Generation”, about heroism & bravery. While watching the episode I felt this man’s pain. I dialed into the story and the sadness. Then it hit me. This story isn’t real! Why do I immerse myself in things that are fake instead of “Rejoicing with those who rejoice; weeping with those who weep.” Romans 12:15
Is it to disengage, to relax? Yet I can become fixated on movies and shows – they become part of my life, and I forget that there are people around me that have stories that need to be heard. “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” ~Maya Angelou

How many tragedies could be avoided if only someone would speak and someone would listen?
Do we give people around us more attention than we give video games, TV, or Facebook? I need a break and love watching shows, but I’m reminded not to forget what my priorities are. What will matter at the end of my life? How many shows I binge watched or video games I played, or how I impacted someone’s life and allowed that person to impact mine.

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"That Mom"

Life is… “That Mom”

Before I was a mom I never thought I’d be “that mom” who got a checkout line opened for her at Walmart because her son was having a meltdown. But there I was astonished (because Walmart is always short on cashiers, embarrassed, and yet so thankful!) I never thought I’d be “that mom” whose son ran across a busy street. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared in my life, so unbelievably thankful the cars stopped, and then feeling like a complete failure as a parent, because who lets their little boy run out into traffic? I’m “that Mom”….A Failure! A Bad Mom.

You may dismiss these feelings with ‘No you’re not. It happens to everyone.’ Although it’s true - these feelings can’t disappear in a second. I know there will be many more times of feeling like this, but here’s what I've learned….

1) I was easily willing to judge someone else’s parenting, mostly from afar, not even knowing the person’s name, yet when it happened to me I wanted grace. I was not living by Matthew 7:12a “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you.”

2) I am not going to be a perfect mom…obviously! I think we all know this, but there is such pressure by others and ourselves to be perfect parents and raise perfect kids.

And 3) Most importantly I am not defined by my mistakes. Of course I want to learn, grow, and change, but my failures won’t envelop me. This is one of my favorites… “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present not the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” ~Romans 8:38-39

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Making a Difference

Life is…Making a Difference 

I was at a graduation where I heard the typical, don’t be afraid to be different – make a difference. Inspiring. I want to be different and make a difference, but if I’m completely honest with myself sometimes I don’t want to be different. I don’t want to go against the status quo. I want to be accepted. I don’t want to stand out. I want to be invited.
Then I go to the other extreme where I feel like I’m not making a difference. I read the new

Tim Tebow book Shaken; when he wrote John 3:16 on his eye black in college and 90 million googled the verse during the game. This year the Tim Tebow Foundation is hosting 350 proms at churches around the world for people with special needs. Wow! Obviously this doesn’t happen just because of one person, but I feel a little insignificant, that what I do doesn’t matter. I teeter between wanting to do more and a relief that I don’t have to. I don’t have the platform, twitter followers, or ability to make the nightly news.  Then I realize I’m extremely blessed. God has given me talents and treasures to use not to give myself more comfort but to help others. Am I doing what I can (really doing what I can – being different), or am I getting bogged down in my day to day needs, wants, and routines to see the big difference I can make- if only I will.  

“Don’t limit what He (God) can do based on how you limit yourself. Be you, and let God be God.” ~Tim Tebow Shaken
Matthew 25:14-30  (The Parable of the Bags of Gold)

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