Hate or Love

Life is...Hate or Love

Tears are flowing, my stomach is upset, I’m frustrated and mad seeing our country and the world. I don’t want to see any more news; I just want to hide…curl up on the couch and watch a feel-good Christmas movie. Maybe that’s what I need for a few hours, but then I have to confront reality again. There is so much hatred. Where does it stop? How can one person do anything? What can I do? Questions that can overwhelm me into doing nothing and also makes me bitter, angry, judgmental, and if I’m brutally honest I begin to hate.

What is the opposite of hate…love. What is Love? “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

A pretty long list that makes me realize that I have not loved well. So instead of focusing on others and the hatred I see I will focus on showing love. Because the only person I can change is myself. Maybe doing my best to truly love won’t change the world, but it might change a few people that I run into, and it will change me.

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Politics

Life is...Politics

You might not know that in high school and the beginning of college my dream was to become the President of the United States. What changed? It became more and more apparent that being in politics probably meant focusing on and digging up dirt on another candidate and slowly letting my beliefs be bought.

 

Now I realize that this can happen with anyone or any job. We slowly say yes to one thing and no to another not realizing that we're in a valley and not on top of the mountain we intended to be on. Yet it seems utterly apparent when we look at politics today.

As this election comes to a close I want to share a verse I have been reminding myself every time I get worried.

Daniel 2:21 "He (God) changes times and seasons; he deposes king (or presidents) and raises up others. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning."
My prayer is that people will find their hope in God and not politics - maybe then our country will see peace and be able to show kindness to one another.

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Teaching

Life is...Teaching

I took my son to a splash park. He had a great time, but as we were leaving he saw a pool, and he started whining that he wanted to go there. I tried to quickly explain that we were able to go to the splash park today, and we needed to go home. Nope, that didn't do it. Meltdown! We got to the car, and after the tears stopped I tried to explain gratitude. It went something like this...

'We had a really fun time, right? When we do something fun it is not kind to whine about doing the next thing. We need to say thank you and be grateful for what we have and get to do.'

As a three-year-old he kind of understood. But at 32 I feel I only kind of understand gratitude. I find myself wanting more, more, more. I may say "Thank You", but I want the next thing. I don't have tantrums at splash parks anymore :), but I find myself needing a reminder to be thankful and grateful - Period.


"Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." ~1 Thessalonians 5:18

"Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe." ~Hebrews 12:28

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New

Life is…New



My very first blog ended with a prayer that God would give me the opportunity to carry another baby and to hold him or her. He has answered my prayer. In October a baby girl will join our family! We are thrilled, but I’ll be honest with you, when I first found out about our miracle I wasn’t excited – I didn’t feel anything. After losing two babies I was too scared to get excited or begin thinking of our family growing. I had it in my head that after we got past the first trimester everything would be okay, I could begin thinking of our future, and get excited. Then one Sunday at church there were two songs about how life comes from God, and I had this wave of realization….1) Anything can happen at any time. Three months isn’t the all okay – three weeks old, two years old – no number is a guarantee. And even more sobering 2) I had not even thanked God for answering my prayer! My mindset changed, and we are ecstatic to meet our little girl!

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Celebrations

Life is…Celebrations

Today marks Chris and I’s 10 year anniversary. I have had it in my mind for a while that we were going to do something big to celebrate our 10^th anniversary, so I came up with a plan. When that fell thru I went to Plan B. When plans B, C, and D also fell thru I just sat and cried. Then I let myself have a pity party for about a week.

Obviously I wasn’t focusing on the good in our lives. I put so much emphasis on this one day of our ten years, when it’s more than just one day. It took 3652 days of choosing to love to get to this “special day”. Many times we put so much emphasis on a day that no matter how great it is it can’t live up to our expectations. Birthdays, anniversaries, Mother’s Day, and especially weddings. I was thinking back to our wedding – I loved the day – it was perfect! Well, it obviously wasn’t…here’s a picture of butterflies that were supposed to be released after the ceremony.

Chris and I bought the kit a few weeks before. They came as larvae, we built the boxes, fed them, and they were ready for our wedding day. Chris was in charge of brining the butterflies, which he did, but he couldn’t get inside, so he left them in the truck and kind of forgot about them for a while. Chris still promises they weren’t dead, but they did not want to fly either! I think one or two butterflies actually flew away. It really was a funny sight and great memory! I knew our wedding day wouldn’t be perfect, and I knew that the ceremony, the day, didn’t matter as much as focusing on our upcoming marriage. Somehow I forgot about that at our 10 year anniversary. I got so wrapped up in the number, and if I’m honest I got wrapped up in being proud that we had made it to this “momentous milestone” in our marriage. That’s never a good place to be…giving yourself all the credit when you don’t deserve it.
“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” ~James 4:6 and 1 Peter 5:5
So 10 years will come and go without fanfare, and I’m okay with that. Maybe we’ll take a big vacation for our 12 ½  year anniversary!

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Patience

Life is...Patience

Can a three-year-old teach you patience?

If you asked me a year ago I would have said no.

Then I see how my son has so much love and patience for his pets, and I realize I can learn from him. When the cat climbs our screen door, or the dogs start whining an hour before they get fed my patience goes from 90% to 0% in seconds. Before I can respond my son calmly says, "It's okay puppies." or "Silly kitty get down." It's a humbling experience...a reminder to show patience and love.

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My Identity

Life is...My Identity

There are so many titles or categories society places on us, and more importantly the titles we give ourselves. Anything as small as cat lover/dog lover, Ford fan/Chevy fan all the way to our marital status, gender, age, race, work title, religion, political view, and the list goes on and on. Many times there is nothing wrong with this, but when it becomes who we are it is. 

We are taught to say, and we mostly believe that we are so glad we are not all alike, but why do the littlest things that make us different upset us? 

-Tattoos or not

-How much money someone makes

-What kind of music you listen to

What if we started seeing ourselves and others the way God sees us?

What if our identity isn't in our job, our children, our money, or anything else, but in God?

This may be something you need to wrestle with, but here are just a few things God says about you!

-You are loved. 1 John 4:10, 1 John 4:16, Romans 8:35-39, Romans 5:8, John 3:16

-You are a brother or sister of Jesus. Romans 8:29

-You are a son or daughter of God. Romans 8:15-16, John 1:12, Galatians 3:26

-You are a friend of Jesus. John 15:15

Dad's

Life is...Dad's

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My Word

Life is...My Word

Someone asked me to pray for them, and I said, “Of course”. Two days later, I realized I hadn’t. I was ashamed. Am I too busy to truly pray for someone? No! 

It really struck me that I can’t be lackadaisical about this. I can’t just say, “I’ll pray for you,” because it’s the ‘right thing to say’. I have to truly mean it and then truly do it! It made me think, do we believe it when someone says they will pray for us? Or, do we think of it as a saying something like, "Have a great day!"? I hope not.

God always wants our yes to be yes and no to be no (Matthew 5:37), but when we are using Him as our ‘reason,’ I think we should be extra vigilant.

After I was convicted about “I’ll pray for you,” I wondered...do we say other things without really meaning it? Things like, “This is where God wants me” or “We felt God calling us here.” It’s easy to say these things because no one will question it. Don’t say it if you don’t mean it. It will eat at your faith and destroy your credibility. 

When I had surgery a friend said she’d pray for me, and then every couple days, she sent me a Bible verse. It was amazing, and I have taken this idea to heart with many interactions because it makes me stop my ‘busy life’ and look up a specific verse. It forces me to do what I said I would do...pray for them.

Potty Training

What I Learned from Potty Training

-A lifetime skill may take years, but once you truly learn it you have it for life.

-I’m not in control of my son. I can help him, love him, and show him the right way, but it’s up to him to decide.

-There will be mistakes made in public, like peeing in your “big boy underwear” :)

-When you think you’ve learned something - you probably haven’t. There are always steps back.

-Chocolate and gifts work better than stickers, no matter how much you don't want to resort to them :)

-Getting frustrated and upset does absolutely no good - it actually hinders.

-Sometimes you have to go somewhere you don’t want to - into the men’s bathroom to get your son, because he knows he’s a boy, not a girl :) 

-This is only one of the first life skills that must be taught - Here’s to parents who teach their children these life lessons and learn something themselves! :)

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