Things that Change & Things that Don't

 Life is...Things that Change & Things that Don't

When I think of how to explain the last 9 months it almost seems impossible. How do you explain the craziness? It has been so life-altering & changes daily. I think this is the pinnacle of the destruction, the madness, the hurt, the heartache, the uncertainty - but it's not.

For me I can sum the changes into:

Fighter jets used to bring me a sense of peace

           -

Now they bring fear

So much has changed in 9 months

BUT...

God is still the same.

"For I the Lord do not change; therefore you, O children of Jacob, are not consumed." ~Malachi 3:6

There is NO OTHER place to put my hope. Everything has changed. Everything seems uncertain. EXCEPT God!

"For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is in him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken. On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us. Selah" ~Psalm 62:5-8

Will you join me on focusing on God and not on the headlines?

Will you join me in bringing TRUE Love, Hope, & Light into a world that DESPERATELY needs it?!

Life is...An Obituary

 Life is...An Obituary

My Gma would have been 87 years old today. Sometimes I write as the emotions hit me. Sometimes I need to process in order to write.

My Gma died almost a month ago. I could share a million memories, but I'm not sure they would matter to you.

An obituary is fine but is so incomplete. Here is what I would say about my Gma.

1 Corinthians 13:13 was read at her funeral..."And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love."

My Gma lived out FAITH, HOPE, and LOVE.

And I would add JOY.

They weren't just words that she didn't put into action. She lived them out to show their purpose and their power.

Even during her last months, during a worldwide pandemic, she was teaching me. 

Here's what I learned through her Actions...

1. Even when I'm confused, scared, and hurting I want to be someone others want to be around. Someone who exemplifies JOY and HOPE.

2. Even during a pandemic of fear Gma showed LOVE and FAITH. She said but also showed that LOVE drives out Fear!

There is a great song by Kari Jobe "The Blessing" 

"May His favor be upon you
And a thousand generations
And your family and your children
And their children, and their children

In your coming, and your going
In your weeping, and rejoicing
He is for you, He is for you"

I feel comforted during the weeping and thankful for the amazing blessing that has come to me, because of the FAITH, HOPE, LOVE, and JOY from previous generations. 

May we continue it on to be a blessing to others.

Life is...Waiting 4 Death

Life is...Waiting 4 Death

Just rants. Just rants. Just rants.
No checking. No filter. No censoring. No...

Just pure emotion. Pure heartache.
Pure sadness.

Confusion.

What?
What am I supposed to do?
How do you wait?
How do you wait for someone you love to die?
How do you go on as normal?
How do you be there for them?
What is enough?
What is right?
What helps?
What?

Cry. Cry. Breakdown.
Grieving before the death.
Grieving as if death had already come.
Grief.
Pain.
Sadness.

What do I say?
Do I pretend everything is normal?
Do I breakdown?
Do I say everything I’ve said before?

Do you know?
Do you know how I feel?
Do you know how much you’ll be missed?
Do you know?

Memories
I have them.
No - it’s not enough.

Don’t say contrite things.
Don’t try to take away my sadness.
Let me be.
Let me mourn.
Let me.

It may not be right, but this is how I feel.

I love you Gma!

~Nancy Bruscher
www.GenerationsToGenerations.com
Dedicated to Capturing Memories
Blog: https://lifeisbynancy.blogspot.com

Last Words

Life is...Last Words

What words of encouragement and love are you not sharing, because you are too busy?

"Gracious words are like honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body." ~Proverbs 16:24

Twice in the last year I did not take the time to reach out. 

About a year ago, on a Monday, I felt a tugging to call an elderly Mary Kay customer. I felt the tugging for 3 days, but I didn't call. 

I was busy. 

Truly I was, but really too busy to make a phone call?

Even as I felt this struggling and didn't do it I told myself - I'll do it later. 

If I could text her I could do that, that's fast, but she doesn't text. An actual phone call - I just dont' have time for that today.

Then I was on Facebook Wednesday night (I guess I had time for that!) and I found out she had passed away earlier that day. 

I had felt God nudging me to reach out, but I didn't take the time. 

It haunted me.

I don't know what I was supposed to say or what she would have said to me.

I decided I wouldn't be too busy again.

WELL....I guess I didn't learn my lesson because a few months ago I again felt compelled to call an elderly man, a Generations to Generations client. 

AGAIN, I kept putting it off. 

Same excuses...
I'll call soon. I'm really busy. I don't have time to actually make a phone call.

This time I received a phone call from my mom saying he had passed away.

I don't want to live in guilt, because that doesn't actually change me, but I do want to learn from these lessons. 

Putting off words of encouragement or just a word to let someone know they are loved and being thought of should not be dismissed or left for later.

This is an eerie verse that hits me to the core.
Jesus said, "I tell you, on the day of judgement people will give an account for every careless words they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned." ~Matthew 12:36-37

My BIG question is - Am I more willing to "find time" to complain on social media more easily than I am willing to call and share words of life and love?


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Big, Small, or House Church?

What's the best church: big, small, or house church?

Here's the answer: whatever one you prefer. Whichever one God has called you to. Now I know you have reasons and convictions why you think one of these is the best, and that's fine, but there is no room for rudeness. When we judge and bicker amongst ourselves we are not only hurting one another and tearing one another down, but others see the hurtfulness and don't want anything to do with Jesus. 

Is this one reason Christianity is dying in America? 
Because we can't show love?

"Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us." 1 John 4:11-12

Some of the differences we have are minor. Kind of like California going strawless.  Yes, I understand the reasoning, but there are so many bigger humanitarian needs. Christians, let us not fight over whether to have a drum in worship or whether you can wear hats. It's imperative to have your convictions and beliefs, but let's keep our eyes on the prize.

There are people who are... 
-starving
-dying
-being killed for their faith
-in slavery
-forced into sex-trafficking
-living without the hope Jesus brings!

BUT we're too busy bickering about insignificant points. We're not all the same, of course not, all of us are different, so it makes complete sense that our faith journey and churches will look different. 

Let's show love first!

Then in love and prayer God may show you how to lovingly correct. If all we do is correct and judge without showing love no change will come. Only hurt and continual dissension within the Church instead of unity that lets Jesus' love shine into the world.

I started writing this post last October, but never finished, because my desire is not to cause more hurt or tension. I understand how hard it is. I have been to conferences where I was writing about this topic and the very next speaker was difficult to listen to. I did not like her delivery or agree with her. But I hear God reminding me - don't be so quick to judge. Love first.

Let me leave you with a positive note...

Our church has been going through a difficult season. There were many weekends I didn't want to go, because it was so hard to see people hurting and leaving. But David was always excited to go and many weekends a guest speaker would be there. The message was good, but what always stuck with me was they said they were praying for us and their church was praying for us. 
Now their churches don't believe exactly what we do, but they saw people hurting and instead of condemning or gossiping they decided to show love. They prayed, and we've had churches all over Parker, Colorado, and the U.S. showing their love and praying for our hurting church. 

THAT is the Church!

Perfectionism

Life is...Perfectionism

It has been a long since I posted a blog. Yes, I have been very, very busy, but if I am honest I haven't written, because of my perfectionism.

I want the blog to be perfect - for example the layout and highlighting of my latest blogs annoys me. Why is it formatting that way?

But more importantly I want the content to be perfect - BUT IT CAN'T.

I am human. 

I will do my best. 

I will ask God for the right words.

I will pray that it is helpful to you.

But if it's not or you disagree, that's OK. We can disagree and still be friends or disagree and still be loving to one another. 

Is that too much to ask in our society? 

Disagreement with love?

There's your ? for the day.

-Thank you for sharing my blog.

The Prostitute's Bed

 Life is...The Prostitute's Bed 

I had the opportunity to go on a short-term mission trip to India last year – I felt so bold showing and sharing about Jesus. We prayed out loud with people of different faiths in a county where evangelism is prohibited. We went in the slums and brothels, where we sat on the women’s beds where they make their living. We listened to their story, hugged them and prayed with them. We met with a man who used to own women and sold them in the brothel, and prayed with him.

I know I’m equipped, so what is holding me back from doing this every day?
One of the beauties of a short-term mission trip is the limited amount of time you have. It gives an urgency to speaking and sharing Jesus’s love. Yes, intellectually I know that we don’t have much time here on earth, but it’s hard to live in that mindset. 
So, I think the answer is being on short-term mission in every day life….I can say for the next 2 weeks I am going to work on showing God’s love to my neighbors. The following 2 weeks I’ll focus on showing love while doing errands. The next 2 weeks showing love at work, and ON and ON. This can easily keep me engaged and not growing complacent with God’s call to love others.

Another reason I find it so hard to love others around me is people are confusing, annoying, frustrating, complicated, & irritating. I know, that applies to me too! In a lot of ways it is easier to love someone I just met – it gets harder as I realize their strengths and weaknesses, and they get to know mine. It is easy to show God’s love for a moment – harder for a lifetime. Personally I get worn out and tired of dealing with people in this broken world. When I get discouraged I turn to God’s word. Here are some of my favorites.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” ~John‬ ‭16:33‬ ‭NIV‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” ~‭‭Galatians‬ ‭6:9‬ ‭NIV‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬

My prayer is that I will be bold in sharing Jesus’s love EVERYWHERE I go.

Dreams (part 2)

Life is...Dreams (part 2)

Waiting for someone to die is hard, emotionally draining. I was miles away struggling: how do I be there for her and my family? Had I done enough? Had I said everything I wanted to say? I had, a million times, but still those doubts come. Gma wanted to go to heaven. I had never seen her stop fighting before. She was ready.

Sometimes I asked God, why don’t you take her? Please don’t make her suffer!

“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” Ecclesiastes 3:11

God’s timing is perfect!

Maybe Gma was ready, but her friends and family weren’t. God had something to teach us through that time of waiting.

Dreams

Life is...Dreams

Grandma (Gma) Redenius and I were sitting in a parking lot. I was driving and she was in the passenger seat. She said, “Get a cookie if there are still some in the freezer.” I knew she meant one of hers – cooking and baking were part of who she was & she passed on that gift. I gave her another huge hug and with tears in my eyes I said, “You know I love you very much.” She nodded. She was almost too tired to respond. She looked at me and said, “You have to let me go now. I need to rest.” I agreed. I put her car into drive, held her hand, and said, “I will be right here.” We started driving. She closed her eyes and not long after, she went to heaven. I pulled over, cried, and opened the window (symbolically letting her spirit go).

I woke up.

The clock said 3:44 am. I knew I wouldn’t be sleeping anymore that night. I went to the bathroom & prayed. My daughter cried. I was reminded that life goes on, even if we’re not ready for it to. (Ecclesiastes 3:2) I fed Rachel and then covered up my son and gave him a kiss before I started the long day…

I waited to hear - was Gma still in hospice or was she finally Home.

Home with the Lord she had served her whole life.

"That Mom"

Life is… “That Mom”

Before I was a mom I never thought I’d be “that mom” who got a checkout line opened for her at Walmart because her son was having a meltdown. But there I was astonished (because Walmart is always short on cashiers, embarrassed, and yet so thankful!) I never thought I’d be “that mom” whose son ran across a busy street. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared in my life, so unbelievably thankful the cars stopped, and then feeling like a complete failure as a parent, because who lets their little boy run out into traffic? I’m “that Mom”….A Failure! A Bad Mom.

You may dismiss these feelings with ‘No you’re not. It happens to everyone.’ Although it’s true - these feelings can’t disappear in a second. I know there will be many more times of feeling like this, but here’s what I've learned….

1) I was easily willing to judge someone else’s parenting, mostly from afar, not even knowing the person’s name, yet when it happened to me I wanted grace. I was not living by Matthew 7:12a “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you.”

2) I am not going to be a perfect mom…obviously! I think we all know this, but there is such pressure by others and ourselves to be perfect parents and raise perfect kids.

And 3) Most importantly I am not defined by my mistakes. Of course I want to learn, grow, and change, but my failures won’t envelop me. This is one of my favorites… “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present not the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” ~Romans 8:38-39

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Hate or Love

Life is...Hate or Love

Tears are flowing, my stomach is upset, I’m frustrated and mad seeing our country and the world. I don’t want to see any more news; I just want to hide…curl up on the couch and watch a feel-good Christmas movie. Maybe that’s what I need for a few hours, but then I have to confront reality again. There is so much hatred. Where does it stop? How can one person do anything? What can I do? Questions that can overwhelm me into doing nothing and also makes me bitter, angry, judgmental, and if I’m brutally honest I begin to hate.

What is the opposite of hate…love. What is Love? “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

A pretty long list that makes me realize that I have not loved well. So instead of focusing on others and the hatred I see I will focus on showing love. Because the only person I can change is myself. Maybe doing my best to truly love won’t change the world, but it might change a few people that I run into, and it will change me.

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog!

Patience

Life is...Patience

Can a three-year-old teach you patience?

If you asked me a year ago I would have said no.

Then I see how my son has so much love and patience for his pets, and I realize I can learn from him. When the cat climbs our screen door, or the dogs start whining an hour before they get fed my patience goes from 90% to 0% in seconds. Before I can respond my son calmly says, "It's okay puppies." or "Silly kitty get down." It's a humbling experience...a reminder to show patience and love.

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