Things that Change & Things that Don't

 Life is...Things that Change & Things that Don't

When I think of how to explain the last 9 months it almost seems impossible. How do you explain the craziness? It has been so life-altering & changes daily. I think this is the pinnacle of the destruction, the madness, the hurt, the heartache, the uncertainty - but it's not.

For me I can sum the changes into:

Fighter jets used to bring me a sense of peace

           -

Now they bring fear

So much has changed in 9 months

BUT...

God is still the same.

"For I the Lord do not change; therefore you, O children of Jacob, are not consumed." ~Malachi 3:6

There is NO OTHER place to put my hope. Everything has changed. Everything seems uncertain. EXCEPT God!

"For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is in him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken. On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us. Selah" ~Psalm 62:5-8

Will you join me on focusing on God and not on the headlines?

Will you join me in bringing TRUE Love, Hope, & Light into a world that DESPERATELY needs it?!

Life is...Breastfeeding and a World Hurting

 Life is...Breastfeeding and a World Hurting

I was reminiscing this morning about when David and Rachel were babies. I was fortunate to be able to breastfeed them, and anytime they would get a cold or start to feel sick I would give them extra kisses deliberately trying to get the germs they had, because I knew I could fight it easier than they could. I was stronger, and I could pass those antibodies on to them. 

Now our world is facing extreme sickness. 

Physical, yes, but also emotional, mental, financial, spiritual...

I am not saying deliberately try to get sick (that would not be helpful), but the same thought process applies as it did when I was breastfeeding. 

I am strong. Let me help!

How can you help someone who is hurting? Are they physically sick, are they lonely, did they lose their job, have they lost hope? 

Since March we have prayed daily for our family's health, but we always ask for health so that we can bless others. 

"God, thank you for our health. Please continue to keep us healthy so that we can bless others. Be with those who are not healthy. Let us see them and be willing and able to help."

Right now I am strong. How can I help you?

Life is...Waiting 4 Death

Life is...Waiting 4 Death

Just rants. Just rants. Just rants.
No checking. No filter. No censoring. No...

Just pure emotion. Pure heartache.
Pure sadness.

Confusion.

What?
What am I supposed to do?
How do you wait?
How do you wait for someone you love to die?
How do you go on as normal?
How do you be there for them?
What is enough?
What is right?
What helps?
What?

Cry. Cry. Breakdown.
Grieving before the death.
Grieving as if death had already come.
Grief.
Pain.
Sadness.

What do I say?
Do I pretend everything is normal?
Do I breakdown?
Do I say everything I’ve said before?

Do you know?
Do you know how I feel?
Do you know how much you’ll be missed?
Do you know?

Memories
I have them.
No - it’s not enough.

Don’t say contrite things.
Don’t try to take away my sadness.
Let me be.
Let me mourn.
Let me.

It may not be right, but this is how I feel.

I love you Gma!

~Nancy Bruscher
www.GenerationsToGenerations.com
Dedicated to Capturing Memories
Blog: https://lifeisbynancy.blogspot.com

Big, Small, or House Church?

What's the best church: big, small, or house church?

Here's the answer: whatever one you prefer. Whichever one God has called you to. Now I know you have reasons and convictions why you think one of these is the best, and that's fine, but there is no room for rudeness. When we judge and bicker amongst ourselves we are not only hurting one another and tearing one another down, but others see the hurtfulness and don't want anything to do with Jesus. 

Is this one reason Christianity is dying in America? 
Because we can't show love?

"Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us." 1 John 4:11-12

Some of the differences we have are minor. Kind of like California going strawless.  Yes, I understand the reasoning, but there are so many bigger humanitarian needs. Christians, let us not fight over whether to have a drum in worship or whether you can wear hats. It's imperative to have your convictions and beliefs, but let's keep our eyes on the prize.

There are people who are... 
-starving
-dying
-being killed for their faith
-in slavery
-forced into sex-trafficking
-living without the hope Jesus brings!

BUT we're too busy bickering about insignificant points. We're not all the same, of course not, all of us are different, so it makes complete sense that our faith journey and churches will look different. 

Let's show love first!

Then in love and prayer God may show you how to lovingly correct. If all we do is correct and judge without showing love no change will come. Only hurt and continual dissension within the Church instead of unity that lets Jesus' love shine into the world.

I started writing this post last October, but never finished, because my desire is not to cause more hurt or tension. I understand how hard it is. I have been to conferences where I was writing about this topic and the very next speaker was difficult to listen to. I did not like her delivery or agree with her. But I hear God reminding me - don't be so quick to judge. Love first.

Let me leave you with a positive note...

Our church has been going through a difficult season. There were many weekends I didn't want to go, because it was so hard to see people hurting and leaving. But David was always excited to go and many weekends a guest speaker would be there. The message was good, but what always stuck with me was they said they were praying for us and their church was praying for us. 
Now their churches don't believe exactly what we do, but they saw people hurting and instead of condemning or gossiping they decided to show love. They prayed, and we've had churches all over Parker, Colorado, and the U.S. showing their love and praying for our hurting church. 

THAT is the Church!

India

Life is...India

I am not doing well. Mentally. I don’t know how to process this all. I just want to hide. To sleep. To get away from all this. I don’t even know what “this” is. God I’m feeling so much and I’m scared. I’m scared. What am I supposed to do with these feelings. What am I supposed to do when I can’t even think. When I can’t even put words toge

ther when I don’t know what I’m thinking, just that I’m feeling something. I’m hurting Lord. I’m hurting. I feel in a daze. I don’t really want to talk to anyone. I’m afraid they will tell me something that I’m not supposed to hear – that is not from You. What do I do with the knowledge that You have given to me today? What do I do with it? It feels like it’s suffocating me. I don’t know what’s suffocating me, just that something is. 

I think it’s so hard to know what to do – what to think – how to act. Lord, I don’t even know what I’m writing, just that I need to write, just that I need answers, just that, just that. I feel like you’re breaking my heart, for what purpose? What should I do? What should I do? I don’t want to get caught up in the silliness of this life, of what doesn’t matter, of conversations that will only hurt me and not build me up. I take things so seriously, so emotionally, so deeply, and sometimes I can’t deal with it. Who can I trust? Who can I share with? Who will give me sound council? 

I take things so personally, and I want to fix everything, and things impact me so deeply. I want to retreat. I don’t want to know more. Break my heart for what breaks yours, but I don’t know if I can. My heart isn’t as big as your heart. A verse just came to mind, “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” ~Isaiah 55:9 I’m so tired. This has made me so tired. Exhausted. I don’t even feel like I can smile, because I’m hurting inside. I have to remember I'm only seeing a small portion, a tiny story, and God I pray that You, only You, only You, only You show us what to do with that.

A little background…this was written in India after hearing firsthand, horrific stories of persecution – beatings, death, and rape because of their belief in Jesus. Their resolution to not back down from their faith – not denying Jesus. It was so much to take in – too much. 

I wasn’t sure if I would share my feelings and writing  – it is not well-written, but it is real. It is truth. It is raw. After writing and writing and writing - not knowing how I was going to get out of bed and face the rest of the day God gave me what I needed – not all the answers, but enough peace to continue. To smile. To rejoice. 

But, it doesn’t really matter where I was coming from. I think every single person has felt like this – overwhelmed, actually more than overwhelmed, drowning, right? 

If I lay my burdens down. If I take the TIME to talk with Him. He will answer you. He will give you Peace.

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened." ~Matthew 7:7-8

Perfect

Life is…Perfect

Last night I was praying and contemplating the question…why when we believe in Jesus can’t we be perfect? Why can’t we do what He wants us to do, act like we’re supposed to, and not hurt others or ourselves by sinning?

I was expecting to contemplate this for days or months and honestly within a few minutes this is what came to mind.
+We wouldn’t need God anymore.
+We would only need Jesus once.
+If we were perfect we would be our own god. He would not be King.